Iridescent

It's almost over.It's been a year and I have to deal with something quite familiar coming to an end. It's daunting. It's like being in a self-contained vacuum for a year and then BAM! the world suddenly comes rushing in. THIS is what you SHOULD do, you keep on hearing that phrase.It is what you SHOULD do, not something you want to do.You don't want to be useless, so you grin and bear it (no, it's not grin and bear it... more of a sigh of resignation). It really doesn't help your case any that you're bollocks at it and that thinking of doing it for years is enough to send you into hysterics. It makes you feel stupid,makes you feel that you're not good enough, it's like a mantra of self-loathing that plays over and over again. I just needed to vent out. Writing this without revising and stuff. Call it a catharsis of sorts.

Good luck with other people understanding me....

It's no surprise that people don't even get what I'm trying to say.I even baffle myself at times.